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Students Take Sudden, Class Time Wasting Interest in Politics

politics After the sweet, sweet taste of missing around a half of hour of dreaded school for Obama’s inauguration, students have voiced a dramatic increase in politics. Countless cries for more political coverage and less school crap are being heard from X-hall to the heaters. Just kidding, we aren’t allowed to use the heaters, despite a growing interest in energy debates that occur during my 2nd period English class.

Even the immature freshmen are finding the pros and cons of politics interesting. One Connor Jo stated, “This stuff really gets me up. Watching North Dakota Senator Bryon L. Dorgan speak about habeas corpus is just plain intellectually arousing. He tends to be a little long, but his points are firm and his stance strong.”

Second semester Senior Jessica Wolf explains the general appeal of politics. “This stuff is so, like, interesting. Can you believe Obama is considering talking to the U.N. Special Assembly on Plant Watering Processes? Soaring food commodity prices could have a dramatic influence on consumer elasticity!”

She added, “And his speech happens to be during fifth period physics.”

Some are not so quick to fall for Wolf’s typical ploy. Econ teacher Mr. Wheeze responds, “Clearly [Jessica] is in the wrong. Does she really think a slight decrease in gross product supply will have a net effect on large market retail distribution? This is basic stuff, man.”

He was quick to note, “Though I am not a fan of my fifth period class. I wouldn’t mind not dealing with those dimwitted slowtards. And it is nice to hear a president who could get an A in Freshman English Survey.”

Change is in the air. Hopefully, it is me no longer having to change for gym.

February 12, 2009

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