BY E. PETER WITZEN
As part of a pop-culture jabberwocky, Fergie of the Black Eyed Peas posed a question that has beleaguered today’s young hip-hop fans. As part of their hit song “My Humps”, a simple question is asked. What are you going to do with all that junk?
Although it seems simple, the question is deceiving. One would typically answer, “Well, I’m going to put my junk inside of my own trunk.” But the quick-witted Black Eyed Peas have taken their lyrics one step further. They do imply that the junk is already inside of the trunk as they follow up their question by saying. “What are you going to do with all that junk…inside of your trunk?”
Fans of all different types of music have responded without delay to the question. Rap music fans like Tether Frett reply “Well first I was going to pimp my ride and get straight crunk. Then, I was gonna’ put my junk inside my refrigerator.” Similar responses have been documented among all rap fans. Fans of heavy metal music such as Bernard Adel say, “What am I going to do with all of my junk? I’ll tell you what I’m going to do. I’m gonna’ provoke death to the mortals, and after I go to the Mudvayne concert, I’ll pass out on my couch and stash my junk under my bed.”
Different responses have been registered in fans of country music. The Flipside’s correspondent to country music still wishes to remain anonymous. However, s/he says, “If I had excess junk, I’d get on my ol’ horse, ride into the sunset, and hang it.”
But even with all of these terrific answers, the Black Eyed Peas still want to know: what will one do with all that junk? Following the trend of hip-hop questions posed on society, chances are this question will remain answerless too, still seeing as nobody knows who let the dogs out.