DEERFIELD—Just last week in a press statement, local teen Jeff Stafman announced that he wants to play in the NBA when he gets older.

This came as shocking news to many members of the Deerfield community, but Stafman has it set. “I got this whole thing planned out. I figure if I start practicing five hours a day and lifting weights in the other nineteen there’s no way the Nuggets can turn this down.”

Stafman was a member this year of the sophomore boys basketball team whose record was barely .500. “They just gotta wait until I hit my growth spurt. Then we’ll be sick.” The 5’9” Stafman plans on being 6’10”, but he’s not banking on that part of his game.

“No one thinks I can do it. But I know I have it in me,” remarked Stafman. “It just takes some dedication. Plus, I really, really want to play in the NBA.”

Stafman’s impressive average of 1.3 points per game has attracted scouts from many different colleges and NBA teams. Duke, Ohio State and UCLA all have given Stafman offers. The Clippers, Heat and Bulls say they’ll all keep their eye on him as well.

After playing the 1-17 Antioch Sequoits, Stafman impressed many with his 3 points, 2 assists, 2 rebounds, and 2 turnovers. “When I first saw those stats, I thought this kid was a fluke,” said famous NBA coach Phil Jackson. “But after watching him play in person, I knew that Stafman was real deal.”

When asked about Stafman’s chances in the NBA, New York Knicks’ head coach Larry Brown said, “I’ve never seen a player be so active while sitting on the bench. And the effort he shows during the warm-up drills; we could use more of that on the next level.”

“It’s gonna happen,” says Stafman. “I’m gonna prove these naysayers wrong. You just watch, Deerfield.”

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