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Our First Article for the 2017-2018 School Year

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Where Did You Want To Go To College?

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A Few Final Announcements From Flipside Founder Barney Schmutz

Well, thank you all for being here for the announcements. Let’s get straight down to business. First off, Earthworks will be meeting after school next Tuesday on the moon for…

The Flipside: Year in Review

DEERFIELD, IL—So, you are finally starting to take your AP tests and you have realized that the seniors in your classes have been checked out for at least two months.…

Valet Company: “We Are Not Responsible for Lost, Stolen, or Damaged Cars”

GARNER, NORTH CAROLINA—In a recently updated version of their waiver contract, the Valet company outside of Tom’s Fancy Restaurant has made drastic changes to help out their insurance policy. Users…

Opinion: “Like Honestly, I’m Probably Going to Fall Asleep During Post-Prom”

By Jordan Stein All right guys, let’s be honest right now. This whole post-prom thing, I don’t really know what to say about it. I’ll probably go, ya know? A…

This Day in Flipside History

1340: Flipside narrowly escapes the Black Death 1492: Flipside helps Columbus get lost 1501: Flipside perfects the code of chivalry 1863: Flipside coins the first paper money 1922: Flipside creates…

My K y Do sn’t Work!

By P t r Gouland SACRAM NTO, CA—This always s ms to happ n at th worst tim s! I was just in th middl of writing my A Tal…

DHS Student Gets a Perm…Oops

New AIM Feature Allows You to Monitor Your Buddy’s Blood Pressure

By Buddy Lentil ARLINGTON HEIGHTS, IL—With version 3.2.01 of AIM entering the hearts and minds of Americans everywhere, many reacted passively and almost failed to notice the astounding new AIM…

Japanese Create Uggs Spinnoff Called “Mugs”

OKAZAZI, JAPAN—With the market for copycat products on the rise, Japanese company Feetness (true name lost in translation) has surged at the opportunity to remake the now famous Ugg boots.…

Aging ’85 Bears Do the Super Bowl Shuffleboard

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