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Elaborate Tattoo Homecoming Set Up Still Leads To Rejection

Elaborate Tattoo Homecoming Set Up Still Leads To Rejection

Homecoming for most is a happy time, but every now and then word trickles down about a sad story like the tears trickle down the rejected kids face. For instance, Flipside Gossip has discovered that Patricia Hancock rejected Freshman Eric Silverman to homecoming. However, Eric thought he would surprise Patricia by tattooing her name and a picture of her face on his arm with the words homecoming also forever stitched in his skin. What makes matters worse, Silverman’s parents are uber-Jews and it just makes this writer giddy to find out the rest of this juicy story as it unfolds. My guess: Bloody Snoz.

Eric is not alone in newsworthy Homecoming screw-ups. In a very sophomoric manner, sophomore Blake Green made a puzzle for his princess. Unfortunately for the anonymous female, Blake let out his inner-nerd and made a puzzle with over 500 pieces, leading the female to ask out Blake’s best friend in frustration.

In an idea so embarrassing it pains me to report, Freshman Cody Flanzer asked Harriet Tubwomen to homecoming through Facebook. Not only did Harriet reject Cody’s request to be in an open relationship, she outright refused to even say it’s complicated. This was a big blow for Cody, who admits, “I have always been watching Harriet from afar, checking every picture she is tagged in, and talking to her only via e-mail. Honestly, I just didn’t see this stab right through the center of the heart coming, leaving me half the man I was before, but now with an irreparable separation in my chest.” He went on, but I didn’t bother listening. What a loser.

December 30, 2008

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