BAYFIELD, WI—After approximately seventeen seconds of focusing on this article, local student Jud Oliption, found himself unable to make it to the next sentence.

“Yeah, after the word ‘found’ it was really impossible for me not to pay attention to the bright colors on the Earthworks banner. Are you in Earthworks?”

Jud’s friends said that it was impossible to notice his ADD, except for the few times when he started doing jumping jacks at lunch just to relieve his boredom.

The next article, by the way, is very good and entertaining, so I suggest that if you too have made it this far, that you move on to the next one.

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