Rock Paper Scissors Tourney Turns Catastrophic

STUDENT UNION-Hopes were up with a cycle 34 day lingering in the near future. But, little did we know that controversy would break out in the serene “Student Union.”

A game was being played in tournament format with all three essentials. Rock-Paper-Scissors. Fierce and mighty competitor Johnathan Woodson was cleaning out the field of 16 contenders all competing for the right to be declared “Rock-Paper-Scissors Champion,” and a plaque in the Student Union.

With referees Peter Cullins and Bob Jamison closely eyeing the players, there was clearly no cheating going on, or at least we thought so.

With the semifinals coming to a closure, the competitive attitude was too much for defending champ Yoky Flanders to handle.

We had our final. A classic duo. David vs. Goliath, Ali vs. Frazier and now Woodson vs. Gunnersberg.

In a series best of 5, the score was at a deadlock 2-2. Hearts would be broken and careers would be made. No matter what happend, both of their lives were going to change forever.

Woodson chose rock, and Gunnersberg, choose the reliable paper (picture above). Woodson was petrified. Gunnersberg jumped in victory and pumped his fist through the air like he just dont care.

But, it appeared Gunnersberg had released his paper split seconds after Woodson had released the daring rock. Bob Jamison reviewed the tape and it was clear that he did make his decision too late. A decision that has changed his life.

This scandal will go down as one of the biggest in Deerfield High School Township history along with the time Randolph lost his essay in the library. And to this moment, may Jon Woodson’s plaque lay in the Student Union with pride.

-Colonel Repture(Staff Writer)

November 28, 2008

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