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Local Teen Forced to Explain the Various Bases to Parents

By George Minkowski DEERFIELD– After becoming fed up with not understanding the baseball metaphors for sex in teen movies, two local parents worked up the courage to ask their son…

Student Loses Handbook, Can’t Remember To Buy A New One

By Buford Stetson DEERFIELD, IL – Local Freshman John Morris lives a very organized life. He does all of his math homework (even if the teacher is not checking it…

Toyota Debuts Aggressive New Ads

Orthodontists Without Borders Dispatched to Great Britain

Jesus, Car Keys Found at Church Retreat