Flipside Writer Promises Not To Ask Prom Date Publicly

prom As prom rapidly approaches, people scramble to figure out their plans, find a group, or come to terms with their social incompetence. Prom drama is, of course, more exciting than the dance itself. This year is no exception.

In one horrific case, a good intentioned male bought his prom date a beautiful dress with a note “prom?” Unfortunately for him, the dress was two sizes too small. Not only will the dress not work, but neither will the date.

The “prama” mainstays are present this year. Several guys have asked girls way taller than they are. Also typical are the conjoined twins who screw up the 12 person to a table rule. Yet again, a desperate senior advisor asks her hot freshman to share a fun night of laser tag, limo cruising, and peer pressure education. One senior asked a French foreign exchange student, only to discover that his French was not good enough to understand she would not be in America for prom.

A particularly famous prom idea was executed by Hebrew Honors Society President Abraham Isaac Bergsteingold. Dressed up as Moses himself, he parted the X-hall sea and bestowed upon a young lady the Ten Commandments, including thou shall go to prom with me, thou shall attend my lake house, and thou shall wear a kippah. Besides for dropping the Ten Commandments, and thereby bringing upon Dr. Hebson’s departing wrath, all I can say is “holy cow.”

Last but not least, a Flipside editor was notified by his prom date not to ask her publicly, for it would be “too embarrassing.” So, it should come as no surprise… He will uphold her promise.

May 19, 2009

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