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Home » 2010 » January
Fornero Can’t Figure Out How to Hide E-mail Recipients
By George Minkowski and Rufus Schwartezngoggle HIGHLAND PARK, IL– Last Thursday, students from Township High School District #113 had their fingers crossed for a snow day. These students went to…
Concern Builds as Women Everywhere Follow Oprah’s Progressively Stranger Recommendations
By George Minkowski In recent days, Oprah Winfrey has begun an alarming descent into insanity. However, middle-aged women around the country continue to take her increasingly bizarre advice. Oprah has…
Area Teacher a Real Stickler for Significant Figures
By Lars Henry As of last Wednesday, area physics teacher Trent Keynes officially became a “stickler for significant figures.” Although this may sound insignificant, the physics department is now up…