CB058380DEERFIELD, IL— Rachael Miller, a Deerfield junior, studied her butt off for Ms. Levine’s Pre-calc final, but still got a C-. This brought her semester grade down to a B and her odds of getting into college to 0%.

Since she was young, Rachael was always college bound and very motivated. But perhaps she just didn’t want it bad enough because she got a C- on one final junior year.

“[Rachael] is a very intelligent girl, or so I thought,” Ms. Levine tells Flipside reporters. “She did so well in the class and I was sure that she was college material, but then she got 144/200 on the final. I’m really disappointed in her. I told her she should just drop out… of school.”

“Odds are, Rachael cannot even calculate the percentage she got anymore.”

Ms. Levine is not alone in her shock and disappointment. Rachael’s parents are quite upset as well. According to a source, Rachael’s parents are “going to like kill her” when they see their child’s report card.

“My life is over,” Rachael says. “There is no way to bounce back from a C- on a final. So let’s just face it now, I’m not going to college.”

Even though Miller has a 3.6 unweighted GPA, her other teachers have also given up on her after hearing about the C-.

“Now if I was going to apply to college,” Rachael continued holding back tears and a runny nose, “the schools would just be like ‘C-? No way’ or ‘OMG! Rachael got a C- on her Pre-calc final. Rejected!’ It’s hopeless.”

To make matters worse for Rachael, she has been banned from the CCRC, WERCS, Math Lab, Foreign Language Lab, and Library because the faculty doesn’t want her “stupid” to spread to students who actually have a chance at life.

+ posts
You May Also Like

In Defense of WDT

WDT is under attack. They’ve been made villains by nearly all of…

Dunkin’ Donuts Changes Name to Be Politically Correct

by Anfernee Van Tarkus MASSACHUSETTS-Leading donut and coffee provider Dunkin’ Donuts has…

SparkNotes Releases SparkNoted SparkNotes

By Jeremy Hoodaman SparkNotes, the sworn enemy of English teachers everywhere, recently…

I Really Don’t Know Which Super Power I Want

by Austin Graypad Recently, I have been asked about super heroes, or…